I often wonder, will I ever reach a point in my life when group situations will not seem awkward. Even when I’m with people I know, I still feel awkward and insecure. Like that little shy girl. Why is that?
I don’t know why groups of people overwhelm me. I get all anxious and one of two things will happen. I will talk TOO much, or sit in a corner and not talk at all. Come on girl, get a grip!
Every time I allow myself to fall into this trap, because that’s all it is, I could mentally torture myself. (And many times I do.) I’m working on it though. God has blessed me with VERY patient and loving friends. They will rescue me from my self-imposed seclusion, and are learning to reign me in when I start rambling to fill awkward silence.
Maybe one day, I’ll find that balance, and for once in my life, seem normal. (Notice the word seem…you may laugh now.) Until then, I will seek God’s will and guidance, and read a good book. Thanks Lisa Whelchel for Friendship for Grown-Ups, it may save my sanity!