How’s that for a title? Seriously, though, God has brought us down a path over the past 6 months that is both very exciting and completely terrifying.
Where to start…
How about here: About a year ago, at a women’s conference, I first heard the song Oceans. You know the one. I was so moved by it…literally moved to tears. I wanted God to do that kind of work in me. I wanted to not fear His will, whatever that may be. I wanted to be willing to go wherever He called. So, I began to make that my prayer. Every time I would hear the song, I would make it my hearts cry. God kept it on my mind and in my heart. I would find myself singing it at random times, my heart’s prayer.
Fast-forward several months, late summer I believe, all I know for sure is that I was in the throws of a “Who Do You Think You Are?” season and totally in my genealogy state of mind. My sweet hubby comes in one afternoon and asks me, “How close is Kershaw, South Carolina to where your ancestors are from?” *Insert nerdy squeee* Um, my great-grandfather was born there!! Then he tells me that he’s been contacted by a church there. Excitement ebbs a bit and terror takes over.
*God, that’s SOOO far from our family!*
You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown, where feet may fail
Well, that’s all it is for several months. My husband and I purpose to consistently pray for God’s will over our family & His church. God revealed to my hubby two very specific tasks to complete at our current church. Not easy tasks mind you, many nights of prayer went into these. It was very difficult for him at times, but I love my man of God, he faithfully followed. Here’s the most awesome thing…the morning after he finished the final of the two tasks, the church called him again. (God doesn’t play games guys. He is full of awesome!) It was a serious call, a we’d love to talk more in depth call. A terrify this little girl to the core call.
Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You’ve never failed, and You won’t start now
So, we began the task of SUPER heavy prayer (with the addition of a few faithful prayer warriors) and conversations. You’d think by this point in my life, and through all the things God has brought us through, I’d have no fears with following Him with blind faith…WRONG. This little mommy is a worrier! This southern belle is really a home body! This planning girl doesn’t like for things to be “up in the air” or unknown. (You’d also think I’d know by now that God doesn’t work like me.) Ministry at the intersection of one place and another is HARD, I’m not going to lie. If you are serious at all about loving and working for Jesus, you can’t just “check-out” from your current ministry home. Things still need to be done. Things still need to be planned and organized…even when you know you aren’t going to be the one to see it through. I can’t even begin to accurately describe how hard that is. My emotions have been a roller-coaster. But, I know God’s holding us in His hands.
So I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours, and You are mine
And now, after many months (and I must confess, a Gideon prayer or two) God has finished the task of preparing us for His work in a new place. We are going, with full faith in Him, to South Carolina. We are excited to see the work He has for our family there. Our hearts continue to pray for His church here, I know He has amazing plans for His precious people here. Change is always difficult, but it can so often be a wonderful thing, especially when it is ordained by the Creator. Commit yourselves to Him! Follow Him without fear and question! It’s terrifyingly exciting!
Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior